Rich Men North of Richmond

Yea, McCallum was just an empty suit at the desk. I did think Brett Baier did as good a job as possible as moderator.

 

McCallum reportedly makes about $7 million a year. Earhardt's salary reports range from $2 million to $6 million. So obviously they relate to the poor working folks who struggle to get by.

 

I live in Florida, but this must still relate to me because all those things in my life are going just fine.

 

$7million???? Holy cow.

 

Not enough country songs about how crypto is in the shitter. We need song titles like "I Told Her Bye Nance, When She Sold All My Binance" or "Bitcoin Miner's Daughter."

 

I don't know much about crypto. All I can think of is "All My Crypto Left on Tiptoe."

 

Funny thing is when I saw how popular Rich men north of Richmond was doing I thought about writing a song. I started thinking of cities I could use and the only one I could think of was a small town in Mississippi, Dumas MS. Dumb ass north of Dumas.

I know Dumas isn't pronounced Dumb Ass but when my sons were little we drove through Dumas and my boys kept saying Dad look there is a Dumb Ass cop or look there is the Dumb Ass hardware store and things like that.

 

Me and my kids did exactly the same driving through Dumas, TX north of Amarillo several years ago.

 

Yeah I think I started it. Look kids there is the dumb ass elementary school.

 

Well, I’m not even sure this is a legitimate question, or rather just a big stick to poke the poop in the middle of the park. Because it’s not merely a racist song; it is a racist anthem. It is a call to arms.

The title and chorus itself is a completely on-the-nose conjuring of the Civil War, which was fought to keep Black people enslaved in America. Anyone who wants to dispute that historically documented fact can excuse themselves from the adult table now. And it is part of the MAGA’s call to Civil War, and their call to violence against liberals, POC, Jewish people, and basically everybody but white nationalists. Of course, always inherent in the messaging is huge hypocrisy, as if there are no rich people living in Richmond pulling strings to manipulate society to keep them down.

The oft repeated line, “It’s a damn shame what the world’s come to, for people like me, and people like you,” is another painfully obvious dog whistle. It harkens to the time when white people used to have domain over all, particularly over people of color, but now that’s all changed. And who these “people like me and people like you” are, can be easily sussed out by our eyes and ears. He is talking about white nationalists. His face could be a postage stamp for white nationalism. And this song their perfect anthem. “Living in the New World”…order. I mean, he’s not even trying to cover up the dog whistles. The very fact that he's singing in a fakey stadium-rock-country twang tells us who the song is for: THE most narrow audience of any form of popular music. Rap appeals to everyone, as does rock, folk, bubble gum pop, etc. Country music appeals to, and is made for, only one very homologous group of people.

The very fact that absolutely nothing in this song is specific, is the biggest tell. They never say anything specific, so that they can claim it doesn’t mean exactly what it sounds like. Listen to every white nationalist speech that doesn’t mention anything specific, and you could find every line of this song paraphrased or directly quoted in every one of them.

The opening lines tip you off right away, pulling religious strings and portraying white men as the hard-working backbone of the country that is being crapped on by the liberals in Washington.

Then there’s the verse that rolls out the very old and tired white supremacist grievance of poor, hard-working, white people starving in the streets, while the big fat welfare, queens are living off their taxes. These welfare queens would be people who are NOT like him, and NOT like you (even though, in reality, white people make up nearly as big a % or welfare recipients as Black people, and they make up almost all the welfare dollars, if you include corporate welfare). People who aren’t white men singing or listening to bad country music songs.

The fact that the only specific thing in the song he mentions is fudge rounds, right after fat shaming his description of the welfare queens literally being around and fudge colored, is an even older and more disgusting racist trope. And the fact that the human fudge round is sitting on the couch eating a foodstuff fudge rounds is their oft-repeated accusation that Black people in America only fail because of Black people in America being lazy and not supporting each other, literally a fudge round eating itself. We know this because white men have been pointing to people of color on welfare, and saying this longer than any of us have been alive. This is why he doesn’t have to be specific. Because we all know what he’s talking about. And he knows that people like TOP will go around pretending he doesn’t have any idea what he’s talking about, and ask what’s the big deal?

Hell, he even squeeze in the Bill Gates tracking chip conspiracy. Claiming that the politicians want to know everything you do and everything you think. And, like all QAnon refrains, he repeats over and over again: they don’t think you know, but I know that you do. Nobody in the world knows what these MAGAs know. Because Qanon told them. They are the keepers of the secret knowledge, because they "do their own research".

And like everything that the MAGAs complain about, the plight described by this singer is completely created by people like Donald Trump and his fellow republicans. Not just in politics, but in his role as a lifetime wealthy cheat and con man, who is documented to have destroyed countless people’s lives by contracting them to do work for him, requiring them to put up all of their own money and resources to get paid on the back end, then refusing to pay them, thus crippling or bankrupting them and their small businesses, and outlasting all of their literally thousands of court cases demanding he honor his contracts. And what people in Washington DC want to control every aspect of this man’s life? Which ones want to live in Americans’ bedrooms, controlling what sex they can have, controlling what contraceptive device they can use, forcing them to give birth even if it will kill the mother, forcing them to follow their religion, forcing them to burn books and erase all history about POC? Republicans. The same people that he votes for and is singing this song to promote and protect.

I don’t know anything about the baseball-beard twang box who sings this, but if history holds, he would be a complete hypocrite, raised and living a very comfortable life created for him by those rich men north of Richmond. Just like that fraud who sang, “Try that in a small town,” has never lived in the small town in his life. Much like Kid Rock was caught on camera pounding Bud Lights mere days after making a big, ridiculous spectacle of shooting them with his guns.
EDIT: At least according to Wikipedia, he is in fact a poor man from humble origins. Which unfortunately solidifies the intent of the song, just casts it in a different light. He's not a rich guy pretending to be a hick to get rich off the hicks - he's one of them, and thus clearly a true white supremacist.

 

You see, this is why all right wing comedians are failures and have to turn to podcasting conspiracies to succeed, and why nobody's conservative friends are ever funny:

Humor has to be based in truth.

The only truth in this comic is that a man is violently, physically forcing a woman not to speak.

To wit: Of the last two presidents, both "rich men north of Richmond", which one is - in truth - being described here? The one that has been living the rich life on everyone else's dime; who got $2 Billion from the Saudis, a pile of business trademarks from China, and election interference from Russia, all for political favors; has TWO coked-up sons, and has used his powerful connections to get him and his family out of legal problems his whole life (AND is currently under indictment in 4 different jurisdictions, AND has been found responsible for sexual assault by a court, and ruled a rapist by a federal judge)....or the guy who rode the train to work his whole life as a Congressman, hasn't had a single shred of proof that he ever did anything wrong with illegal pressure campaigns (the only claim that they keep repeating was authoritatively and impartially debunked years ago), who actually helped his son kick his addiction, and did nothing to stop or interfere with the legal prosecution of his son? It's Trump, not Biden, who lives the narrative of this comic, so the lie of this comic falls flat without humor.

 

Wow! That was a tremendous amount of creative writing effort and detail just to post a humorous sarcastic comment. You forgot the green font, but I chuckle with you anyway. Hope you didn’t have to type that all on your phone cuz if you have fat fingers like me it would have taken two hours to do.

 

There are complete jerks and turds and grifters on both sides of the aisle. Recognize this and your personal life balance will equalize a little bit better and you won’t have to spend so much time wiping furious spittle off your computer screen. And to make damn sure that I don’t keep tilting at my windmill ( phone screen) I’m gonna go out to the garage and tinker with a 1958 10 horse Johnson that I hope to get to push me around the Suwannee River in a couple weeks. Have a great and reflectively calm day.

 

The only people who sell the "both sides do it" BS are right wingers trying to obfuscate from the fact that they are, in fact, the only ones doing it.

Yes, "both sides" are dishonest and grifty, but Dems are old school fudge at the corners and skim off the top while legitimately governing politicians; republicans are a felonious crime spree with zero interest in governing - they are just looters and murderers. That's why Dark Brandon is fixing the latest GOP mess, and Trump and Meadows and the rest of the gang are getting booked and having their mug shots taken every few weeks.

 

It's always telling what you people find funny or insulting. I see a great woman enjoying a joyful laugh. This is a beautiful picture.

Contrast this to Trump's mug shot, or the now viral clip of DeSantis trying to force a human smile at the debate. Weird, creepy AI nightmares.

I'll take the real, imperfect Democrats over the reptilian pod monsters of the right.

 

If by "tapped into" you mean exploiting fear and hatred of a portion of the country that has been lied into a violent frenzy for decades by right wing propagandist networks and politicians, then yes.

 

If you want to easily tell if something is a racist anthem, look who is praising the song and holding it up as their anthem.

For this song...

<checks notes>

...yep, it's the white supremacists.