Here was your actual claim: That is obviously nonsense, and I suspect that you would find somebody telling any other step-parent that to be gross. But, for some reason, you feel compelled to diminish her experiences by claiming that she, as a step-parent, doesn't have children. I haven't twisted a single thing that you said. You just took an awful position, that step-parents aren't really parents if they come into their life later in development. Why you felt compelled to take that position, you can feel free to explain it.
You won't get me to agree there is some hierarchical importance to an American based on their family structure. I can't think of anything less American than that.
Lol. Dude. You dont walk into kids lives at 15 and 20 and claim you raised them. Mentor? Sure. Loved? Absolutely. But these kids were basically raised. One was completely raised. It isnt gross to say her parental contribution is different than someone there since birth. It's just a fact. Now add on the obvious time spent away from her daughter in the 3 years between 15 and adulthood. C'mon man. Calling me stating the obvious "gross"... is a "gross" misrepresentation.
I'm not asking you to do that. I said myself that it likely isnt important, but the question isnt inherently misogynistic.
A. She didn't walk into their lives at those ages. That is when they were married. Why are you misrepresenting that to diminish her role? She walked into their lives when they were 13 and 17. B. Okay, so you believe step-parents to teenagers aren't really parents that helped raise them? Seriously, that is your deeply held position? Would you be willing to tell that to a step-parent's face? That they aren't really parents to their step-kids.
Wow... I think the Liberal claws are out now in this thread. I need some popcorn... not to be confused with Corn Pop.
And that is how I heard it. I am offering him the opportunity to further explain his position that step-parents of teenagers don't raise children.
You've moved the goal posts for starters you tried to claim she raised them both. That was False. You also ignore that in the 3 years between her marriage to their father and her being an adult, how little time she likely spent. She isnt your normal strp-mom raising teens. Her job kept her away from home a great deal. I have no doubt she loves and adored these kids. She just had a small impact in their literal raising. It speaks nothing of her current impact which may be great, but it isnt an insult to say she wasnt involved with kids that she had yet to even get to know It is just a fact.
That is not what I said. You left out an important word: Unlike you, I am not trying to diminish the role played by any of their three parents. She met the children at 13 and 17 (despite your false claim that she walked into their life at 15 and 20). Their biological mother states that she helped raise them. But you know better? I'm sorry, but that is insanely arrogant. So my friend whose father was a consultant that spent weekdays traveling didn't have a father? People have demanding jobs and raise children all of the time. Not according to their biological mother or the children themselves. But, clearly, you know better than they do about the internal dynamics of their family. As I said, gross. You really should re-think digging in on this position.
It's not misogynistic to claim there is less value assigned to women who can't, or didnt, birth children, whether straight up like JD Vance or tip toeing with the claim like you are doing?
Please tell me where I have equated it to value. My sister adopted her two sons. Both minorities. And she did it single. Her value is immeasurable.
Dude. She didnt help raise a 20 year old.. And she didnt start raising anyone when they "met". They were 20 and 15 when she became their step mom. You guys want to have a boogyman to fight with so badly that you will make up stuff. Are her 3 years as step mom to one child before adulthood the same as what you do for your own kids from birth? Can someone in that position comprehend the lifelong sacrifice that raising kids is? Sounds more like you are trying to diminish what lifelong parents do by saying someone else can show up at the end and do it the same way. (See two can play the twisting game)
The notion that she had nothing to do with their upbringing before marriage is obviously absurd. They met when she was already his serious girlfriend (if you read the story on it) and much of that time came from when they were engaged. Again, you are digging in hard on things you would never dig in on in any other context. Wait, raising kids is a "lifelong sacrifice" but apparently stops on their 18th birthday? Interesting dichotomy in positions there.
