Is the argument that the Tioys are wrong(bad) because they did not officially adopt a HS kid from a severally messed up home? Because they told him he was family m and he should have been adopted? They are wrong because instead they did a conservatory? We have a young lady that we call our daughter. She is part of our family. Stays with us, eats with us, I checkmi on how college is going, pay some of her bills.. we love her dearly.. but we are not adopting her. Does that make her less in our eyes? No Is it possible that the Tioys were also in new territory and were not sure of the best path to take? Is is possible their lawyers were giving them advice on how to proceed? Is it possible MO now looks back and his upset/ jealous that he didn’t get more of the pie ( that is how it comes off). He was given a home, given help with his grades, given an opportunity at the NFL.. all because of the Tuoys. And now they are at fault for not doing …more?
Maybe some clarity can be provided when the reason Oher and the Tuoys have been estranged for the last 10 years is made public. That’s seems like a pretty important datapoint GL and some others seem to think Ohers concern started when he ‘discovered’ he wasn’t adopted. Maybe, just maybe it’s possible Ohers lack of trust came from his lifetime of experiences of his jackwagon absent dad and crackhead mom who would lock him out while she went on her days long benders. Maybe, just maybe his emotional development and maturity was stunted based on the multiple occurrences of some horrendous trama that came long before the Touys came into his life. Maybe just maybe he still Hasn’t come to terms with all of that. I wouldn’t blame him. It’s horrific, and difficult to face and accept what your parents did or didn’t do. According to this article Oher hired and fired all his agents and negotiated without hinderance of conservatorship. The only thing it seems is in doubt, is was He cut out of any royalties from the movie and I would think he would Provide evidence showing he was cutout or copies of checks or wires in the past showing equal pay amount siblings. Sucks for all of them for sure 'The Blind Side' Subject Michael Oher, Tuohys Estranged for 10 Years
applaud your effort to help your ‘daughter’. I can speak from experience to my desire to be seen as ‘right’ in the public eye is not as important as what’s best for my ‘daughter’. She was victim of some abuse and her dad was absent. My role is to provide support and love and safe environment, but I cannot force or make her face the past. She has to decide to do it and even if she lashed out and blamed me for things in public i wouldn’t public air any of that. Knowing what is right. If you don’t have any experience in that you can state your opinion but it’s impossible To fully Understand without the firsthand experience. To paraphrase a movie “ you can’t know what it’s like to be an orphan by reading Oliver Twist”
They are wrong because they told him they wanted to officially make him part of the family, couldn't adopt him due to Tennessee law, and then claimed a conservatorship is basically the same thing. Allegedly. The latter two points were not true. They could have adopted him. If you were to do the same thing to that young lady, I'd call it messed up too. Out of curiosity, why not adopt her? Is it an issue where her parents from the messed up home wouldn't make that possible or would make it extremely difficult? The Tuohys were/are wealthy and had attorneys. They got legal advice on how to proceed. And I strongly doubt their attorneys committed malpractice. That's utter nonsense. He was not "given an opportunity at the NFL" "all because of the Tuohys." Or even mostly because of the Tuohys. Oher earned his NFL career. He was already a star high school football player when the Tuohys took him in.
Tuohy’s were awarded for it how? Do you believe the Tuohy’s went into this situation with the preconceived notion that they were going to use Michael Oher?
I don't know. Blockbuster film that made them out to be heroes. Lucrative career for Leigh Anne (authoring a book, speaking tours, and on TV).
Yep. It’s a long and quite sad story. She is a wonderful young lady in a bad situation. She need stability and love. She came over one afternoon to study, stayed to eat dinner, we picked up on a few clues and hints and asked her to come over again for dinner in a few days. Once or twice a week became every school night. Every school night for dinner became staying over and relying on us for transportation. Pretty soon she became like a daughter. Her mom was as and is still alive but with minimal association with her. We didn’t adopt because of the parents(dad was still alive at that time) and the young lady was and is fiercely independent. Let me be clear.. she didn’t date anyone in my family and nothing untoward happened or would happen. We were very very careful with how we handled that whole situation. She never came over unless my wife or daughters were home. Why? Not because we didn’t trust me or her.. but no need to make it easy for someone ( her parents especially) to make some false claims. I can only imagine the Tuoys situation had far more considerations than any of us know. Seems a little prejudice to throw stones and make accusations without all the facts. Especially when some are making accusations just based on them being “Christian’s”.
Amen. So many consideration we just do not know or understand from the Tuoys pov. My family walked through a lot of that with our “adopted” daughter.. that’s what she calls herself and what we call her… although not technically, legally adopted. We had lawyers help somewhat too.. even a PI.. it’s tough, it’s scary and hard decisions have to be made. As I’m sure you realize.
Again, the Tuohy’s did not make the film, they had no creative control over the film, and also did not make Michael Oher look how he looked in the film.
It is not an assumption when it comes from the film maker’s mouths and we’ve known how films been made over the years. Benefitting from the film again is not their fault. Michael Oher has benefited as well, he has gotten the opportunity to capitalize off of two books he’s written about his life. He has been popular off of the movie.
You: "Tuohy’s were awarded for it how?" Me: "*Lists ways they benefitted*, including the film glorifying them." You: "That's not their fault!" Me: "Even if we accept that as true (which is an assumption), they still benefitted, which was your question." I think we've reached the end of this particular discussion. Oher disagrees.
The Tuohy’s are the ones who accepted this young man at the time into their home. Provided stability, structure, nutrition, nurturing, tutoring, etc. They ended up loosing friends off this decision and now are being publicly run through the mud by the media because of the times we live in now. The time and energy they put into this man, the public scolded they are going through now cannot be measured. Doing speaking engagements is the Tuohy’s wanted to tell their story, just like Michael Oher is wanted to tell his through the two books he’s been pushing. Michael Oher can disagree all he wants, his disagreement is misplaced though.
At the time when he was already a football star. It was a good thing of them to do, but I'm not surprised that people, including Oher, are now questioning their motives after everything. That's your opinion, dude. Oher is entitled to his, and I'm going to put more stock in his opinion on how it impacted his football career.
Sometimes doing something positive for someone else in a profound way is not always a rewarding experience. First there is a real bite the hands that feeds phenomenon. Also, along the way you have to make difficult decisions and along the way and after people on the sidelines and the peanut gallery will second guess you and judge you.
Why am I putting stock in Oher's opinion on how The Blindside movie affected his football career? Because of all of us, he was the only guy there.
He was not that big of Football star before he got with the Tuohys. A lot of colleges were not recruiting him due to fact they didn’t believe he would make it in to college. The Tuohys enhanced his college recruitment. Michael Oher is trying to paint this narrative now to capitalize and wants all the credit for where he is today.
