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Should Men still attempt to help Women in Danger?

Discussion in 'Too Hot for Swamp Gas' started by 11trp11, Sep 6, 2022.

  1. mrhansduck

    mrhansduck GC Hall of Fame

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    I think whether I would personally get involved (physically) would depend on several factors. Generally, I think I would tend to avoid getting in the middle of a domestic dispute. But even then, I imagine that the severity of the situation would play a factor in how most of us would respond.

    None of my analysis, however, would be to consider that maybe women need to learn to accept getting slapped around since they've fought for legal and political rights. This seems like a misogynistic/incel sort of "gotcha" to put women back in their place - "lol, you got what you wanted!" Now, we can debate more mundane acts of chivalry in this day in age; not sure I feel compelled to throw my jacket down on top of every puddle. On the other hand, I hold the door open for men all the time, too. Being considerate should extend beyond sex/gender.
     
    Last edited: Sep 6, 2022
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  2. PITBOSS

    PITBOSS GC Hall of Fame

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    That’s rough. That’s the catch with physically intervening. We’ve seen the occasional news item of someone being physically victimized in public and the theme is “look no one is doing anything”. But worse than what happened to you, someone can get shot. I think of the incident 25 yrs at citrus bowl. guy caught someone stealing from his truck. He and a 15 yr old chased him. the thief stopped and shot him, Paralyzed for life, and killed the 15 yr old.

    but, to the op (btw assuming it’s true), don’t have to be a cage fighter but post 10 or post 17 are good tips. How many times have we heard if only someone called the cops.
     
    Last edited: Sep 6, 2022
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  3. dangolegators

    dangolegators GC Hall of Fame

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    With how many people are carrying guns these days intervening is a good way to get yourself killed. I'd call 911 and try to get the guy's license plate number.
     
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  4. mrhansduck

    mrhansduck GC Hall of Fame

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    That's another practical consideration. If the bad guy is 30 and built like an NFL linebacker and the man who sees the slapping is an average 70 year old man, he'd probably be better off calling law enforcement than putting hands on the bad guy; getting knocked out isn't going to help the victim, and then maybe the 911 call is never made. If the person who sees the violence is a trained fighter, then I would expect him to feel more comfortable intervening. Of course, even then, he would have to consider the risks of getting shot if the bad guy is armed. And of course, this is about averages. There are certainly women out there who can beat up an average dude.
     
  5. G8trGr8t

    G8trGr8t Premium Member

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    at a bare minimum you report it to police along with description of vehicle, tag number, and direction of travel. Even better, follow at a safe distance and keep police advised of their location. I was once handcuffed and put in a car for intervening before being released when the facts came out. Physical abuse of others isn't something I can just walk away from, but that's just the way I was raised and too old to change that stripe now
     
    Last edited: Sep 6, 2022
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  6. tilly

    tilly Superhero Mod. Fast witted. Bulletproof posts. Moderator VIP Member

    I mean he could kill her while waiting.
     
  7. tissuepapergator

    tissuepapergator Freshman

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    Contact the police. Absolutely don't intervene personally unless you believe she is in urgent danger or it's a kidnapping situation. Don't assume she will appreciate your help or will support you when the police arrive.

    Take the license plate and description of the vehicle and call the local police. Domestic disputes are extremely volatile, even the police hate dealing with them.
     
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  8. jhenderson251

    jhenderson251 Premium Member

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    This sums up my opinions pretty closely. If someone's asking or crying for help, I think (or at least hope) I'd step in to answer that call. But I'm not inserting myself in any altercation where help is not requested. People be crazy, and domestic disturbances can be exceedingly dangerous.

    I have a family member that used to prosecute domestic violence offenders. You'd be surprised how many of the abused women (i.e. the victims) would threaten my family member for locking up the person they (somehow still) loved.

    There's a decent chance that if you intervene as a stranger in a fight as witnessed by the OP, both the man and woman might turn on you.
     
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  9. BigCypressGator1981

    BigCypressGator1981 GC Hall of Fame

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    I knew before opening the thread that the "danger" the woman was in was going to be due to another man.
     
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  10. BigCypressGator1981

    BigCypressGator1981 GC Hall of Fame

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    I'd call the cops if any person was being beaten by someone considerably larger/stronger than them. Man, woman or child.
     
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  11. BigCypressGator1981

    BigCypressGator1981 GC Hall of Fame

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    Exactly this. You going to assume the guy hitting his gf in the parking lot isn't armed? I'm sure as hell not.
     
  12. Gator515151

    Gator515151 GC Hall of Fame

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    Y'all have heard my story of the one night of my life I spent in jail. Same situation, I sent my wife after the cops then I grabbed the guy and threw a wrestling hold on him. Never threw a punch just subdued him till the cops got there. We both went to jail. Would I do it again? In the same situation probably. He was smacking the girl around and had her by the throat, probably would have hurt her bad if I had not intervened.
     
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  13. uftaipan

    uftaipan GC Hall of Fame

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    Was this scenario in Moscow or somewhere in Amerika?

    (again, folks, look at the post count and history before you feed the troll)
     
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  14. tissuepapergator

    tissuepapergator Freshman

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    In my opinion you always let the police handle it unless you believe there is imminent danger. Even if it's a hunch or whatever, do what you feel you have to do in that situation. But otherwise, chances are, she feels she needs this guy, that is why she tolerates the abuse. She will side with him, not you. He could be armed, she could be armed. Or maybe you knock his ass out and she reports that they were having a harmless argument when some crazy jumped in.

    Stay out of domestic disputes period, unless you feel the situation is urgent.
     
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